What I don't understand about love is, how can you love someone even with their flaws and faults ? Now, not saying that you shouldn't love someone who isn't "perfect", but I truly believe that what defines a person is the ideals and flaws that one can have based on his/her actions, thoughts, and motives. I want to find out why people can keeping loving even when the other person's flaws and faults are clearly harmful. Is there a bigger good that we strive to look into ? Or is love just a complicated emotion that's irrational and blinding ?
There isn't an answer I could find, not from thinking, not from interviewing my friends who are in a relationship. There seem to be not even a equation formed, and that's why there's no answer. Love is not a formula. Love is, just Love. See, I was born into a family with complicated issues and feelings, sometimes even with toxic twisted ideals, so I strive to find healthier and better relationships in my life. Family is a love I can not escape from, it's a love I can't choose. Yet, even though I understand that we can't choose who we love, can't we choose to love the ones that are "better" for us ? But then again, love sometimes can blind our sense of judgement, making what's "good" and "bad" very debatable. Maybe because I've never been in love, so I'm looking into this issue critically. I only wish that it won't be as complicated when I'm in love with somebody.
Love 201 : Just because He/She is Broken, doesn't mean You have to be too.
Sometimes, love can be tiring. Loving someone isn't easy, trust me, I have days where I wish I'm just a cold stone heart bitch. It's messy, it's complicated, because emotions can often reveal and let us discover the worst in ourselves. Yet emotions also bring out the best of us human beings, one of the things that truly make us humans. It's beautiful, but is it worth it ? The worth of a relationship is the impact that it did on you as a person. In my personal opinion, a healthy relationship should be a good influence on each other to make both of them a better person. That's love should be, but it's not what love is. Love doesn't always make us better people, it can sometimes push us over the edge, or even break us. I'm not ever in a position to say whether someone is healthy or not, or if someone is broken or not. But I will say that you shouldn't stop loving them just if/when they're broken, but you should start to love yourself more too. Don't break yourself, because love shouldn't be as exhausting as it can feel. Give yourself a break, and just breathe.
Break Up 201 : No Need to be "Nice".
To make it simple, there's only really two general kinds of break-ups, the ones that both agree, and the ones that only one wants the separation. If both agree, it's just the matter of giving each other blessing and taking the time to heal and move on. But it's the ones that only one side wants the break-up that gets messy and complicated. And there's no point to be nice here, let's be clear and see how it is can we ? It's a break up. The nicer you're trying to be, only makes it even harder for them to let go. I'm not saying to rude and harsh, but there's just really no point to sugar coat things anymore. Feelings get hurt one way or the other, and it's often not your job to help them get over you or to move on. If it needs to be done, get it done. It'll be difficult, because you may still care for them, but you have to remember that sometimes separation doesn't mean that the love is dead. Love is never dead.
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