It's June, Happy Pride Month !
Be Yourself, Love Yourself, and Be Proud.
Also, I've been accepted onto next school year's Student Council at my high school. I'm excited as I want to take my senior years at this school to really give back, I want to use my voice and role in the school to help spread awareness for the LGBTQIA+ community. I want those students to feel safe, happy, confident, and proud of who they are.
So those students who will be on next year's council are offered to all go to this overnight retreat to discuss about the school issues and plan the events for next year. With me being there, I wanted share my ideas of starting a few LGBTQ+ events in the school to spread awareness, and ironically, I have a story to share that happened at the retreat... I was given the choice of either rooming with the boys, or room alone. Now, I am not happy. First, right after of the meeting where this retreat is announced, I went to speak with the teachers in charge to ask about the rooming issue to see what's the most they can do and stuff. I was clear that I will be more comfortable if I room with the girls, but if there's issues, I can room with the boys. They said that they will need to check with the principle, days later, they told me to give them names for girls who are comfortable. I gave them a name, and I also went around to ask a few girls for their level of comfort. Now, the teachers only informed me the choices I had when we arrived at the camp. I expressed that I would rather room with the boys than being isolated. But right after, with me looking probably very upset walking among the boys to the cabin, the students in charge, two of our co-PMs for next year, arranged me to room the girls. They had found a room with a spare space and they checked with all the girls in that room to make sure that everyone is okay. So there, I was happy and the day went on with no problems at all, until a few minutes before lights out... The teacher came and told me that it wasn't the co-PMs' call, and he personally has no problem with it, it's just the order that he was given by the principle. He cleared out a room in the girl's hallway and made me sleep there alone. The girls tried to convince him to let me stay, but he said that they really can't, the rule is the rule, and he's just doing what he was told. Now, many are outraged, and many friends of mine think that it's just totally unacceptable, which is true. It's really not okay, but it happened...
What was sad is that I couldn't sleep for a really long time because of how loud the other rooms were, I could clearly hear the girls laughing, chatting, and talking. Well, but I think I've really made this into a little lesson for myself. There were times during the night, that I wanted to go wake up the teacher and ask to be moved to the boys' cabin. I hated being isolated and treated like this, I wanted to be with people, and feel like I can have people to talk to. Yet, I forced myself to stay, I felt bad that this had turned into such a difficult situation for everyone and I didn't want to cause even more trouble. But I also wanted to take that night to reflect of why I wanted to be on Student Council, is to make a difference. I want to be the person to stand up for others when this happens to them, I want to be the person to take my experiences to put on the table for others to see that there is a problem. I want issues like this to be talked about, and I want everyone to get educated and be aware of the struggles that some LGBTQ+ students have to go through.
People ask why I'm not angry, and I think other than the fact that I want to use this to further pushes myself to be leader and be an activist instead of just causing a riot. It's because that I felt like I had no one to blame. The teachers were just doing their job, the other students tried their best to support me, and the principle said he's just standing by the school board's policies. And the thing I'm probably most upset is about how difficult it became, and I felt very disrespected when I was given the choice of either rooming with the boys or rooming alone. Like, what was the point of me giving the names and asking around to make sure that the girls were all comfortable ? My effort and my work were all basically useless then, because base on my knowledge, the teachers and the principles never talked to the girls, or the guys, or the parents of the students, to try to give me the chance of rooming with the girls. If they talked to the girls and some of them were uncomfortable, so they gave me the choice, I completely understand. But this is different, and they could have handle it much better. I am a victim of Transphobia, but sometimes it seems like there's nothing I can do to help myself when there's really no one to blame, and then issues like these are silenced. But no, we can do something about it. I've decided to contact with an adult working in the school board to double check on the policies and to ask what I can do with issues like this. Because it's not about me, it's about everyone else in the LGBTQIA+ community as well. And we need to take a stance.
Pride month is about celebrating who we are and our differences, but it's also a time to take a moment to spread awareness. Acknowledge that there are issues and problems, and we need to do our part to help those who can't stand up for who they are. Pride is also about respect, it's about to respect everyone's identity, who they are and who they want to be. Be an ally, educate yourselves. It is not our job to explain to you the process of transitioning, and the definitions of gender queer, asexuality, pansexuality...etc. If you truly care, you should do your own homework, then ask questions to further sympathize and support. And never never be ignorant. A heterosexual/cisgender person should not impose their idea of what gender is and what a relationship should be onto another's identity/relationship. It really shouldn't be a difficult process, you listen, you appreciate, you respect, you educate yourselves, and you understand. Some of us will never be able to empathize, but what we can do is to respect everyone, celebrate and love who they are, and support the community.
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