What is beauty ? Can someone please define 'beauty' for me. According to Google's definition, beauty is "a combination of qualities, such as shape, color, or form, that pleases the aesthetic senses, especially the sight." But is that 100% true ? Is that all beauty is about ? You see, as an artist, designer, perfectionist...etc, we always look for beauty within our surroundings and objects. I do admit that it can be a shallow way of thinking, but I wonder if being shallow is part of our human nature. People often say beauty is different for everyone and people define beauty by their own standards of appeal and interests. But the question is, are our standards affected and maybe even controlled by this society with media ?
And it seems true to me that we humans often have double standards of beauty when it comes to judging ourselves and others. I can only name about 5 people out of everyone I know that has the same beauty standards and judgement towards both themselves and the rest of the world. Or are we just liars ? Maybe we have even fooled ourselves. I as a designer-wanna-be, have always struggled with the meaning of beauty. I agree that some clothing and some looks just fit better on skinny people, but I also admit that I may have been brainwashed by all those magazines and fashion shows about 'who can pull this one off, and who can't'. It has been always a difficult subject, and I just never seem to be able to solve this puzzle with one solid answer.
Anyway, I brought this up because I started a new diet 2 weeks ago on the 11th. I got this diet recipe from a friend of my mom, who is a very experienced nurse by the way. And I've already lost 10 pounds after the first week. It's definitely a big and fast drop, and the recipe itself isn't that harmful. But is it really healthy ? Let's just say I'm not getting any calcium or diary... A lot of my friends don't think this is okay and they are worried about me. And I do appreciate the love and care I'm getting, but I just have to do this.
I would be lying if I say I'm doing this for health. It's 80% wanting to be more skinny and pretty and 20% wanting to be more fit and healthy. I want to be happy; but to be honest, I don't even know if I will be fully happy even if I'm skinny. I feel like I will have to watch myself everyday to make sure I don't gain back the weight if I lose them. You know, people tell me that I'm beautiful and stuff. But what if being beautiful in the inside isn't enough for me ? Is it really bad or greedy to ask for the whole package ? And seriously, it's still a risk, no one can promise I will be more attractive once I'm skinny.
I feel like this is a never-ending topic and I do love all sizes, I always tell other girls that confidence is the key to beauty. But why can't I just listen to myself for just once ? Maybe I don't even believe in what I'm saying to those girls, because I don't even know what is beauty anymore...
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